It's Not Ok and It Is Important

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Two very important campaigns have run this week. From 6th-12th February 2014, it’s been Children’s Mental Health Week, with the theme being ‘Spread a little kindness’. This was chosen by Place2Be.

During the same period an awareness campaign has been running for sexual abuse and sexual violence with the theme #itsnotok.

All-of-You Therapy would also like to spread and show our absolute support for both messages. We have written about our work with children’s mental health based on Place2Be training.

Rape Crisis Scotland have written about the #itsnotokay campaign and we'd just like to say, it is okay to like their posts, it isn't support for the atrocities they highlight but for the fantastic work they do. It is a travesty to see their posts with only one or two likes, come on people, how else can we open up the conversation? It may feel awkward, but we need to talk! We have also worked with survivors of sexual abuse for several years and from words we’ve heard, we’d like to say.

#itsnotok without consent

#itsnotok because you’ve let them hug you

#itsnotok if you’re underage

#itsnotok because you said yes when you didn’t know any better

#itsnotok because of how you dressed

#itsnotok because it was the only person you felt loved you

#itsnotok because you didn’t say no sooner

#itsnotok because they helped you

#itsnotok just because it happened a long time ago

#itsnotok because they act as though nothing has happened

#itsnotok for you to have to give something in return

#itsnotok for your trust to be betrayed

#itsnotokay to have your childhood stolen from you

#itsnotokay to make you feel you’re guilty, worthless, ashamed and unlovable

These are responses to some of the feelings we’ve heard described over the years. Whilst writing this, I’ve had to resist the urge to write, it is okay to…. coming from someone spending time speaking with survivors and reminded myself to stick to the theme. However, now I will say…

…It is okay to feel angry. It is okay to feel furious. It is okay to be happy. It is okay to give yourself credit for who you are and what you are and to allow yourself to feel good again. It is okay to feel love. It is okay to trust again. It is okay to feel proud of you. It is okay to love you. It is okay to fight.

I know my short blog won’t cover all possible personal feelings and responses to such a complex issue. I was careful to be sensitive as I know there are layers, complexities and nuances to every personal situation, especially one so fraught with emotional trauma and weight.

We wanted to let you know don’t need to face any of it without support and #itsnotokay for you to feel alone any longer.

You can contact me on or find other support on the campaign website.

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Erik Sandberg

This is great @all-of-you-therapy - I had to replace some of the hypertext for you just there (mind 'n' put the URL's in in place of the text!) :-) But thank-you for posting and will give it a share before I leave at 5pm! Cheers.

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Hi @Erik! You just beat us to it on some of the editing; Kerry sent us the piece over to 'punch up' a little and the needed edits weren't showing in the on-site publisher before we published for her but were once published, we wondered if there was an issue with the version of Word Kerry used and its compatibility with the editor? Had any issues like that before?


Sorted! I'll keep an eye on it for you, sometimes KILTR doesn't like Word and it might need a bit of tinkering but basically the PlaceToBe text didn't have the URLS inserted but I've already done it, thank-you for such an inspiring blog.

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@KILTR much as we like our Scandi-fonts at sa4creative, the publisher changing all periods and apostrophes to Scandinavian accented letters only on publishing was an eye opener for us! Thank you for the extra editing, very much appreciated, we'll try and keep an eye out for any future issues on clients posts, save you extra work; this was such an important post we were so glad you caught them!

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